Something remarkable has happened. I was finally reading the
manual for my Nikon D3000 as I have so much time on my hands and something
happened. I have a clay head bust which I just acquired and was working with
the setting on the Nikon and I realized I could hide behind the lens in anonymity. This is my comfort level with no doubt. I
have had a saying all life, "I am not for public display". I have
always allowed all around me to take the credit or limelight. In our
Vintage Clothing Store I have stayed out of the front of the camera lens, have
no card, go to very minimal events, never gave an interview, always had my name
hidden to most and never boasted as the “owner”. Never mind all the work I put
in building the stores, the business is in my name, purchasing much of the
product, paying for 95% all these years and always promoting my wife as the
creator. I was in the Vintage world in the 1970’s, sold clothing in 1980 to
other Vintage stores and lived in Vintage Clothing. I do not want praise or recognition
for this. She is the creator, she lives it all day and in her dreams, it just
is what it is. The dream and face of our store is my wife and she deserves all
and I am most comfortable relish the background even if it puts me in the back
seat with a blanket over my existence. I am happy proud of my wife, all her extremely
hard work and happy she has found her dream and love even if her love and
dreams now do not include me. She is a good woman who has not treated me rudely
or incorrectly but, such is life.
So I completely realize
I will not be the one in the front or face of a new Vintage business although I
have piles of it which must go.
It was looking for a partner to do this with as I am inundated with
pile and boxes of Vintage items. I almost went back to work with her to just to
rid myself of the items around me which remind me of this long gone and past
relationship. But, I have a new avenue with just looking through the lens of
the camera at this clay sculpture.
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